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Tradition...

In many European families, the tradition of a Mitzva Tantz is held after a wedding. Once the guests have gone home, the family remains to dance with the kallah (bride) and pledge money to charity. Hence the name. Mitzva (commandment or good deed) Tantz (dance).
During the dance, a "badchen," or "joker" composes rhyming verses to introduce each family member. This was done in Yiddish in the old country, and continues today in English as well.

At my friend's wedding, I watched his Mitzva Tantz, and the idea for this "dysfunctional Jewish family" song came to me.

The jibes are basically "inside jokes" poking fun at some strains of Jews.

If you get it - good. If not, try my other writings. If you're offended - then gei koken oifen yom!

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The Mitzva Tantz

Here comes Reb Meir
Go tantz with a bren
He escaped indictment
And fooled the feds again
His gift to our pushke
Is quite a sight
We'll launder the money
Er geit, er geit

Now feter Shmeeil
Is very well-known
He hocks and hondles
On his cellular phone
He drives a caddy,
He bets on the champs,
But when he goes shopping,
He uses food stamps.

Our dear nephew Dovid
Learns in yeshiva
He had a nice wife,
But he had to leave her,
That her father can't support
Is a terrible crime
He'll just have to dig deeper
Better luck next time!

My brother, Reb Yankel
Has many different names,
With the IRS and Government
He plays lots of games
He flew first class to this wedding,
From a very long distance,
But he still needs to schnorr,
For tuition assistance.

Moishele the lamden,
Is a kollel yugerleit,
He won't dance with the kalleh,
It wouldn't look right,
It'd shter the shidduchim
Ruin his kids reputation,
Then they won't be accepted,
in the Lakewood, I mean, Jewish nation

Yitz the meshumad
brings a curse on our eyes
That he came with a shiksa
was the biggest surprise
He learned in yeshiva,
was a big macher's son,
What turned him off?
We're second to none

The Mitzva Tantz is over,
It was so great
We raised lots of money,
for the poor and tzudreit
Your family should be proud!
Such maasim toivim!
I'm taking 50 percent!
for praising you Ganovim!